Super Wife

It is a GOOD day if I wash and fold laundry, straighten my house, make it to the grocery store, think of a dinner to cook, then cook said dinner. Especially if that dinner uses ingredients. INGREDIENTS. Such a fancy word. Because then this means I probably used a book to make dinner. How academic of me. Super wife here! Then you have those magical days where you can create an entire meal based on items you already have in your house. I am so creative these days.  It really takes some artistic talent to thaw chicken, steam broccoli, and stick a potato in the oven or microwave.  I feel like a true chef. So, most days I am THIS awesome. Of course I switch it up a bit. The following day could be a salad. In which I've really outdone myself on these days. I have sliced numerous veggies and combined them all to create a colorful piece of art. And when my husband sees my brilliance, I have a smile radiating from my face, waiting for a standing ovation and for him to proclaim how proud he is of me. Thank you, Thank you!

The thing is, I can cook. My mom is an amazing cook, so since cooking is an inherited trait, it's obvious why I can do it. But for some reason, the thought of creating an elaborate meal STRESSES ME OUT.  What I remember from growing up: Pot roast, cooked carrots and onions and potatoes, HOMEMADE bread, and green beans that have simmered for over an hour (which means you have to PLAN AHEAD). OMG. My mom was known for her cooking and baking. She sold cakes to a local restaurant. Did you get that? She sold to a restaurant. A RESTAURANT. Not to a normal person who likes to eat cake. But to a PROFESSIONAL COOKING ESTABLISHMENT.  Other kids in my high school would ASK me when they could come over and EAT. Not hang out with me. TO EAT. I was so proud. You want to come over and...eat?

My precious husband will eat anything. ANYTHING. Really. This is truly a gift. I don't think I have ever seen him reject food. And this makes it so easy on me. When I have labored over a baked potato and steamed broccoli, he simply say's "This is really good Kelly, thanks for cooking." Of course my sweet husband, do you expect any less from me? My elaborate cooking methods is also why I rarely post recipes. Because most of the time they are from a book and not from my brain. Every now and then I come up with a great idea, which of course I have to post so everyone can see how together I am. And how I am the most wonderful wife. And how I can DO IT ALL!!...Like how we are suppose to be these days.

But you know the best kind of books?

The ones that are created by local churches. Just a bunch of women who have put together a collaboration of their best recipes. These are the recipes you can use for the first time on guests. When you want to look fancy and have something super tasty but easy. And you know which ones I usually end up cooking? The ones by my mom.

My little six monther

I can't get enough of this baby. I smother her. I admit, I do. But ya know, she can't talk nor can she walk, so I'll do it while I can!

She can finally sit up by herself! There is a catch...she has to be naked. I think her diaper throws her off. A friend suggested to take off her diaper and see if she can sit, so after bath time the other night, we did! She lasted a few minutes until she face planted. I was probably too busy capturing pictures of this amazing feat to catch her before she hit the floor. She didn't cry. In fact, she loves being on her tummy, so she was probably happy to be there. Every time I lay her on her back, she flips right over to play on her stomach. Oh and she likes to swim. Preferably breaststroke. We haven't tried it in the water yet.

Oh, hey mom.

Seriously mom, stop. I'm naked.

Oh, and really how cute is this bum? Ahh I love it. Every night before I go to bed, I walk into her room and kiss her g'nite. It takes a lot of self control for me not to pick her up and snuggle. Especially since she is such a cute sleeper. I LOVE that she sleeps this way.

Once again, thank you for reading another mom post. I just want to make sure I document these sweet moments so I can look back at them after she has grown!

Avoidable Anxieties

I have had a breakthrough. An "ah ha" moment.  Quite encouraging actually. And it all begins with another trip to the hospital. Not for me, of course. Nor for Addie or Eric. A friend of ours had a baby so I went to visit to meet the cute new bundle of joy and discovered what should have been for me, the obvious.

All of these questions I am about to ask apply to those with full term, healthy babies:
How many of you mamas, pumped every few hours while in the hospital?
How many of you mamas were told that you couldn't leave your house with your baby for 8 weeks?
How many of you mamas were told by doctors that if your baby got sick would immediately be put into the hospital with a spinal tap?
How many of you mamas were told that you must start out by feeding your baby with a syringe (of breastmilk) and could not exclusively rely on nursing yet?

I ask these questions because I was told every single one of them. I delivered at 36 weeks 5 days. Two days shy of full term. My baby was 4lbs 12oz. Yes, she was small but healthy. She didn't have to go in the NICU and was allowed to go home with us two days later. She was fully developed, in every way. YET, I was scared to death of this tiny person. I was fearful that she wouldn't eat well from me. I was fearful to leave my house with her. I was so cautious about who I let hold her and was a hand sanitizer nazi...because of everything I was told while in the hospital.

Anyways, when I went to the hospital to visit my friend, I noticed she didn't have a pump beside her bed. I was confused. When I was in the hospital, I pumped around the clock. Immediately, she told me that she never pumped (with her first) unless she wanted to store extra milk for date nights. Huh? This was not my experience. She also was never told to wait EIGHT weeks to take her baby somewhere.

I realized that they treated me and my baby as if she were a severe preemie. Which is interesting, because again, yes she was small, and yes I delivered preterm (2 DAYS!), but she was fully developed in every way. I believe many of my fears and anxieties about this tiny baby was completely unnecessary and could have been avoided. 

Hopefully, now that I realize that my experience was not normal, next time I will be a little less overwhelmed :)

Just grateful

  As I sit here in the quiet of our tiny two-bedroom town home while Addie naps, I can't help but feel grateful. And blessed. Not because every day is perfectly scheduled and always goes according to plan. Or because our house is huge and I never feel crowded. And it's not because Addie is the perfect baby and never cries and always smiles. If you follow my Instagram (kghovis) or this blog, I can confidently tell you all those pictures I post can be quite deceptive. In those pictures she is typically always smiling, never messy, and so am I. While I am grateful that Addie is, for the most part, a happy baby, she is not perfect. She cries. Screams too. Sometimes I cry with her. She woke up this morning with boogers on her face, but I didn't think you would have wanted to see it, so I didn't take a picture. In fact, who really takes pictures of the messiness of their life? I've never seen pictures of someone crying after an argument with their husband. I've never seen someone post a pictures of their hair falling out or changing colors because of anxiety. Or never have I seen someone post a picture of themselves with their therapist. Some people only know us from our blog, twitter, Facebook, or Instagram. And those perfectly deceive us. They are good and fun, I use all of them. A lot actually.  But really (for the most part) they reveal the life we want other people to see.

As I began typing this post, my intentions were not to rant about social networks. Really, I was going to tell you how perfect my life is. Just kidding. But back to the first sentence. Why am I grateful? Because Christ has and is continuing to make me so content in the simple, not glamorous, life that I am living. Don't get me wrong. Being a stay-at-home mom is hard. But I absolutely love it. I wish I could say that I never complained about being too tired, or just needing a break, or that my daughter is driving me nuts. I am an imperfect person, I need grace. The first 2-3 months of being a mom, I sometimes caught myself saying "Wow, I am not getting anything done today." I would say this because Addie was being extra fussy or feeding around the clock. But then when I realized what I said, I would laugh. Really? What do I think I need to get done? Dishes? Laundry? Dinner?

Seriously. Would my job be to stay at home and clean and cook if I didn't have a child? No. I would still be teaching. My job is Addie. My first priority is Addie. Yes, I have only one child, so technically my job is cake right now. If I meet Addie's needs, give her attention, prayed for her and loved her well, I did my job. Then I can clean and cook. Or do whatever else I feel necessary. I never want caring for my child become a reason for me saying those words.

I am also so grateful for my home. We have a tiny house, and while I do wish sometimes it was a bit bigger (to host more people), there are so many times when I look around and can't believe we own a house. This place we live in constantly reminds me of God's kindness towards Eric and I. When we bought this house we had no money. It makes us laugh to think about the fact we actually bought a house at the time, therefore, we absolutely know it was God who provided this home.

My heart is full. And it's not because we have a lot of money. It's not because we have a huge house or fancy cars. It's not because our closets are full of designer clothes. And don't get me wrong, just like most girls and well, humans, I find myself sometimes longing for these things. And honestly, when I am longing for those objects I find myself at my most discontent. The reason my heart is full today is because I am marveling in my relationships. Really. I love my husband. I love my baby. I love my friends. I love my family. I love Jesus. And I am just grateful.

2 months of honesty

For me to remember:

At 2 months...
Weight: 10lbs 4 oz 
Length: 22 in 

She got her shots, screamed, then was fine for the rest of the day. I was so proud of her and myself! I didn't cry! Probably because my MIL and mom did most of the night feedings that week...so I was well rested.

She is making lots of eye contact and is smiling a lot. I LOVE IT! Motherhood is so fun! It is such a joy to see her progress. I'm so excited to hear those giggles.

She pulled her first 6 hour stretch through the night at 10 weeks.

Since then she has gone anywhere from 4.5-6 hours at night.

On a side note...

It took me a little while to have full joy in being a mom (just being honest). Not because I don't love my baby...because I absolutely do. My hormones were a bit crazy, causing some anxiety and depression for the first little bit, but God has graciously healed me, and I love being a mom and taking care of Addie. Don't get me wrong, it's still really hard, but she is such a blessing to me...plus she is just so stinkin cute. I am very open with my experience, so if you want to hear more about it, just let me know! There is no such thing as perfection, ESPECIALLY in motherhood, so we need to be open and honest with each other. And really, none of us have it all together, so let's not pretend like we do. Honesty is encouraging because we know we are not alone. What helped me through my post-partum is talking about it with other moms, which gave me hope that my craziness would eventually end because other moms were honest with me too. Now, on to looking at really adorable pictures.